he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
