We should be called the Road Head Warriors
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
