Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
