Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
