i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
