why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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