So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
