It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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