What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
