Non-Jews are for practice
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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