i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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