I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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