He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
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