I hate all girls vehemently.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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