His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
