soooo we both peed the bed last night...
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
