wat bout pragnant strippers??
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
not ubering you a puppy
Randomize