I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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