went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize