I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize