Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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