so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
