She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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