He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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