You're completely useless in the revolution.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
