I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
