Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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