Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize