I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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