Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
