i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Randomize
