Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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