Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
