It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize