Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Randomize
