Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize