nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Randomize