I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
