So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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