Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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