you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
