I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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