I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
