Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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