Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
