The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
