STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
worst night to have a conscience
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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