YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
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