is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
