I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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