i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
You left your phone here
Wait...
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
