im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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