Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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